A University of Arkansas at Little Rock study has caught onto raccoons secretly creeping into the lives of humans as their domesticated pets. Sound like a new film “Planet of the Raccoons?” Seems to be heading in that direction every day, much faster than the study indicates. Raccoons have often been referred to as “cute trashcan Panda’s”. They are coming out of the closet now in full force! Rocky Raccoon (pictured) has decided to put Donald Trump to rest in his deserved early grave by running for President of the United States of America, keeping pace with the last known honorable Republican, President Abraham Lincoln.
Rocky Raccoon, totally in tune with the tens of millions of Americans who demanded the overturn of the entire Authoritarian Fascist regime of the hopeful dictator Donald Trump (who actually stated he prefers the title of King Trump to his so-called real news crew and then was filmed dumping shit, actual real shit, on the American people from an airplane. Donald Trump has also previously stated to the real news there were airplanes in the Revolutionary War and then later blamed a teleprompter for his really fucking stupid moronic statement, great coverup King Donald! Donald Trump is increasingly under the very watchful eyes of everyone on planet earth currently incarnated here in human form, in fear of their own demise, now cowering to the superior non-fearful species of raccoon. Humans are the only species of animals on earth known to have an emotional body at all and have the ability to rationalize and express fear as an emotional response to the shared reality all humans believe is real, likened to the real news of the wannabe King Donald Trump.
Raccoons are now under the threat of being deported to Easter Island by Donald Trump responding out of fear of being eaten alive by the raccoon species who are sick of feeding on the garbage of humanity, live on the real news Donald Trump himself created to thwart any opposition of becoming the first fascist President, are beginning to take shape as a superior species in the eyes of fearful humans planetwide, now sharing the belief Rocky Raccoon will actually lead the American people back to their constitutional inalienable rights of “We the People,” that includes the right to overthrow any government representation that no longer represents the will of “We the People” in order to preserve the freedom guaranteed by the Constitution of the United States of America. Trump intends to deploy American military forces into American cities known to have the largest population of garbage eating pandas, or the species raccoon, to kill or capture them for deportation to isolated Easter Island, the surviving few facing the lack of human garbage as a food source, will simply become extinct for lack of a food source and surrounded by mostly salt water, with none so fresh. Military forces are too reluctant to this fascist notion simply for the raccoon’s cuteness factor as garbage eating pandas. As part of his dedication to serving the American people, Rocky Raccoon will become the first and only non-human ever run as the Republican candidate for President of the United States of America. Most of the raccoon population now supports domestication. A new amendment to the Constitution will have to be ratified by Congress to give equal rights to the non-human species raccoon, and since the entire Trump regime will be in custody for treason, it’s likely Congress will vote to make Rocky Raccoon the next President of the United States of America.